Living on the edge with God

Just a few days ago, I met a really interesting person. I was totally zapped to see him in the state he currently was, although there was no apparent difference in the way he received me, the way he spoke to me etc. What hit me was that here was this man who was selling all that he had as though he is going to need all the money all of a sudden. There was no thought of planning for the future, saving for a rainy day and so on - all of this which he had done pretty well thus far. And he was using this money for executing service projects.
During my conversation with him, I realized that we all claim to be devotees of God but keep saving for an uncertain future as though He is not going to take care of it.
Ponder on this for a moment: it is only the man who lacks faith that thinks and worries about the future. For someone who has no worry about the future since he knows that God will take care of it, there is no such thing as amassing wealth. Both these are contradictory - amassing and storing wealth, and placing your faith in God. That is why Swami would say, one cannot have Daivam and Dhanam both. The one who wants both will get Daiyyam(devil), not Daivam or Dhanam.
Living a life without any care for the future, giving away whatever you have is the way the saints have lived. That is called renunciation and that is why they were considered Godly.
This is what I would call, Living on the Edge - with God.
You dont know whats going to happen next moment, where you are going to get your next meal from, whether you will have a raiment on your body tomorrow, where you will sleep and so on. All you know is that you have an inner connect with God and will act only according to what He prompts. But do we have the courage to live like that.
A friend of mine wrote a beautiful story. It said, "I was hanging from a cliff holding on to a branch. There was a deep abyss below and if I let go, death was waiting for me with its jaws wide open. I closed my eyes and said, "God, help me". The next moment, I heard Him say, "Let go". I couldnt believe it. I concentrated harder and again I heard His voice, "Let go of the branch". I thought if God is saying this, surely He will hold me below and I let go of the branch. But what happened after that simply made my life exhilarating and blissful. I found that I could now fly and soar through the skies. I had a new found independence due to the faith that God knows it best."
I read this and asked myself, if I were in his position, would I just dismiss the voice I heard as my imagination - simply because it seemed so illogical at that juncture to let go. Does logic work always? Or better still - should we depend on logic always rather than intuition?
How many of us try and listen to His voice? How many of us can show the courage to let go when He wants us to......test of faith. How many times has Swami said that we need to place ourselves 'completely' in His hands and then He can mould us and make us worthy instruments in His hands.

Hyderabad Youth helping in cooking

I remember many years ago when I had landed my first job, it was in a call center. After a month of working there, Swami had called for the Hyderabad Youth team to come over to Prashanti Nilayam and serve during the annual Grama Seva event. This is an event when each day tonnes of rice is cooked and food is distributed to the nearby villages. This goes on for 15 days covering different villages each day. Swami's students also take along saris and dhoties for the village folk as Swami's prasadam and distribute them along with the food packets.


When I first heard this, I felt this inner call to let go of the job and participate in the activity. I immediately resigned and went over for the service. What followed was a fortnight of wonderful experiences. Each day was a revelation. Swami Himelf came to the Grama Seva kitchen on the first day - a temporary kitchen set up behind the North blocks for cooking on a large scale. We would work all night and be ready to sleep in the morning. But, since Swami was coming, I decided to stay on till He came there. Imagine my condition - no sleep all night, dishevelled hair, dirty clothes marred with stains of oil and grease and here I was happily waiting for Swami to come. Sure enough, He came along in His car. As soon as He looked at me from a distance, He held his nose as if to indicate that I was stinking from that far. His gesture brought a smile onto the faces of all those assembled there. He called for the in-charge of the canteen Mr. Ramamurthy and made some enquiries around the quantum of rice cooked etc and left. That was the first day.

Image depiciting Swami alighting the car just like He did
when He came to the temporary kitchen

Another day, He sent a message saying that it would rain from 8pm at night to 10am the next morning and therefore we should put all the firewood being used for cooking under the tin shed to ensure that it doesnt get wet in the open. It happened EXACTLY as He had told. We just pushed in the last log of firewood under the shed by 8pm and the skies opened. It rained continuously all night. Wow! What an experience that was. There were several such.
At the end of it all, we were seated in Darshan and were scheduled to leave back to Hyderabad. Swami came along and told us all to sit for photographs and said that He would give prasadam. He had stopped giving padanamaskars publicly by then. However, when He came down to give prasadams, He graciously popped easter eggs into each of our hands and also blessed us with clothes. As He came to me, He asked me if all the boys had worked hard. What do I say? I kept mum since in situations like these, you are in trouble whether you answer in the affirmative or in the negative. Then He asked me, "Nuvvu baaga pani chesaava?" (Did you work hard too?) I replied that I tried to. Swami then materialized a beautiful gold chain and put it round my neck and said, "You have a lot of seva to do." After that Swami said to me, "Did you not leave your job to come here?" I said "Yes Swami".
Swami said, "That was the right thing to do. I dont like you working at night like an owl. Do seva and come here next year. I will give you a seat in MBA."
So, there it was - my innner calling and the outer confirmation from Swami. But, the question remains whether I will ever be mature enough to listen to His voice from within loud and clear - especially in these times when He is not physically around any more. Let us all pray that we can so that we do His bidding and not what our selfish minds would want us to. Let us learn to Live on the Edge - With God!
Jai Sairam.

Comments

CS.Bala said…
TRUELY TOUCHED... VERY HAPPY TO HAVE THE BLOG RELIEVING FROM THE PAIN AND STRAIN. ALL THE VERY BEST... KEEP GOING... GROWING IN LIFE PERSONALLY, PROFESSIONALLY, SPIRITUALLY... AS TRUE SOULDEAR OF LORD SAI
CS.Bala said…
TRUELY TOUCHED... VERY HAPPY TO HAVE THE BLOG RELIEVING FROM THE PAIN AND STRAIN. ALL THE VERY BEST... KEEP GOING... GROWING IN LIFE PERSONALLY, PROFESSIONALLY, SPIRITUALLY... AS TRUE SOULDEAR OF LORD SAI
saipramod said…
Very insightful article bro,did not hear this experience of yours earlier..wonderful!
Venu said…
Thanks brother Bala...your comments are very encouraging
@Saipramod - thanks for the encouragement
Sai Nandagiri said…
There is lot of learning from you as such. Every time i read your blogs or talk to you, i feel delighted. I am not trying to exaggerate. Truly you are a blessed soul to be in close proximity to the DIVINE FEET. And i think i am blessed to read these blogs. Just as commented earlier. I could see all the scenes in front of my eyes. LOVELY. I guess it is just his love towards you and his blessings make you write a brilliant spiritual lovable blog. JAI SAI RAM.
Thanks Sai. Will share more stories as and when I come across one - Inspiration seems to be all around these days. Swami is with us all the time!

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